A Father's Day Tribute From The Father Of My Girls, A Man I Deeply Admire
"I wasn't there that morning when my father passed away. I didn't get to tell him all the things I had to say…" Those words from Stan’s Father’s Day reflection still resonate deep in my heart.
Stan is a man of intact integrity, deep rooted in faith and the best dad I could’ve ever dreamed of for my girls. He is not only a protector, but a great listener and a soft spot for them to land on when they are feeling a little broken or tired. Today, I especially feel thankful for the blessing he is in our lives, and also for his dad who helped shape him into the man he is today.
A few years ago (I think 8 or 9) Stan shared the Father's day reflection at our church and I thought I'd share it with you today! Happy Father's Day to all the dads, mentors and male role models. ❤
“Being extraordinary is a choice, and to be an exceptional father figure, a man has to make a decision to commit to that choice every single day”
I was born in Poland and spent most of my younger years there, together with my parents, my grandmother, and my two brothers. My parents lived on a farm, with a big orchard full of trees and a colorful flower garden - my grandma's pride. Outside the fence, right behind the barn, was a big open space, a picture perfect landscape. A place, where I would spend most of my childhood days.
My parents shared their chores and responsibilities of raising 3 active boys, and working on the farm at the same time. My mom would cook delicious meals for us, take care of the house and send us off to school. My dad, on the other hand, would spend endless hours working in the field, or feeding the cows and horses, or fixing some farm equipment - which for some strange reason kept breaking ALL the time.
Who was my dad... A hard working, dedicated, humble man. A great father... A brave man.
I remember those late nights out in the field "working" with my dad... Then, on the way back home, under a moon-lit sky, discussing serious topics, or politics. One of the questions we never seemed to agree on or find an answer to was: is there life on the moon? We finally came to a mutual agreement when Neil Armstrong took his first steps on the moon and did not see anybody, other than his shadow... My dad and I were glued to the TV screen during the Apollo 11 mission. My dad said to me, "see, I told you the Americans would beat the Russians."
My dad taught me a lot of things, and he always seemed to have the right answers to my questions. I kept wondering - how does he know this stuff?
When the World War II broke out in 1939, my dad was a teenager. During the Nazzi occupation of Poland, he was captured and taken to a labor camp in Germany. He was forced to work in a military factory making parts for tanks and weapons to kill innocent people. He knew this was very wrong. Risking his life he managed to escape from the camp at night, and made it home safely... To me that's brave. I could not believe the stories he told me about his life as a young man during those days. The random executions, the plundering and burning of villages, because some family was trying to save a Jewish life. The capturing of people in the streets, and taking them by cargo trains to Aushwitz Concentration Camp... Those were real stories.
As the war continued, my dad lived with his parents helping on the farm and attending a local school. He had a dream of becoming an aviation engineer and designing airplanes. He went to College in Cracow. Unfortunately, because of the war, and devastation of the country, the school had close down. He had to give up his dream and returned home to his parents. Soon after the war ended in 1945 he met, and later married my mom. It was a time to celebrate freedom. It was time to take on new challenges and rebuild the country. And for my dad, it was a new path of life.
Some 30 years later I came to America, and just like my dad, I found myself on a new path of life. A new country. A new beginning. I came here chasing the dream of a better life, leaving my dad and the rest of my family far away... A very difficult decision to make indeed. Eventually, I became a part of this new culture and the country - and called it home.
Today, I am the proud father of our two beautiful daughters. It is now my turn to carry the torch of fatherhood and teach them a lot of things. And tell them stories that my dad told me. And find the right answers to "their" questions, so they may wonder... How does he know this stuff? And even though I live in a different country and different times than my dad lived in, the same rules of fatherhood apply: the unconditional love, the watchful eye, the sleepless nights - to name a few.
Like most of our kids these days, Michelle and Isabella are involved in a variety of activities. It is quite a challenge to find time for everything and be everywhere at the same time. There is also homework time and bedtime. Story telling by dad is Isabella's favorite, so I'd better make sure I have one story for each night... Michelle prefers browsing on her laptop, then ending with a good night hug and kiss for mom and dad before going to bed. Sometimes we have a quiet conversation discussing serious topics or just telling silly jokes...it works for me.
We now live in different times, where being a parent is not an easy task. Where the foundations of religion, marriage and family values are challenged. Where there is more violence in schools than ever before. Where kids come home to empty houses, because mom and dad are still working. Where the poverty level in this country is on the rise. Where the political system serves only very few people... What does it mean to be a father in these challenging times? Well, in short, it is a serious job and a big responsibility. But like our fathers, we must not give up.
"I wasn't there that morning when my father passed away. I didn't get to tell him all the things I had to say". These words are taken from the song called "The living years". But I think, in some way, they apply to me as well. My father passed away, and somehow, I didn't get to tell him all the things I had to say - and thank him for... the love he had for me, the sacrifices he made, the difficulties he endured and the wisdom he taught me - in his living years. But I am certain, that in his heart, he knew my gratitude and my love for him... And I know he is now watching over us with his watchful eye and always will be... Happy Father's Day!
